Manal and Alaa's bit bucket

Today it hit me, I am really an idiot. I'm not sure how I feel. I thought I was OK but I took forever to wake up. The way fellow prisoners look at me tells me I do not feel well but I can't really feel it.

I'd say prison is not like I expected, but I had no expectations. No images, not even fears, nothing. Guess it will take time. I expect to spend no less than a month here. I'm sure that's enough time to see all the ugly sides of prison, to be genuinely depressed.

I'm in a good cell I suppose. Only one of us with me, Karim Reda, a young Ghad member with no experience. I would have preferred to be surrounded by friends, or to be with someone with experience like Kamal Khalil who would inspire confidence in me and make sense of everything, but I should not complain.

The cell has 3asaker Geish written on it. They tell me it is for gara2em nafseya. Seems everyone here are facing 'darb afda ila qatl' . Their first time. 3 are only few years older than me, 2 in their early 30s, and two older guys. 2 been here since 2003, the rest less than a year. Their first kill (Only one claims to be innocent. Says he is a petty thief). All are sa3ayda living in Cairo, two are neighbors, living omrania, etc.