Manal and Alaa's bit bucket

I hate this place.. and if ther eis a way to delete it.. crack it down.. do whatever that won’t make me feel this feeling, I’ll go for it

L2 bgd…. Asba7 makan ka2eeeb.. wana ka2eba.. w mesh 3ayza elli 3ayzah
U know when u r drunk and you go and knock which ever door infront of you, un awar what it might have behind!!
I did that!!
As if I was in that need to talk
May itbe a strange something to do… may be.. I do not know

So whatever… that place makes me feel suffocating f3lan… w elli mesh 3ayza shof wesho tani

From now one.. its one time and for good…. Not nothing to do with bluelue ever again

I might use another nick and start some where another…

But d

Strange how some people think they are the center of the universe and think they’d change it all. It’s the nonsense of all nonsense of some to stand still and JUST give orders *full stop*. And the point is, at a point I do not take care if those people should stay dear, respectable or appreciated; only I send a harsh reflex.. Sometimes I feel guilty for having such attitude.. but in most cases I do not apologize. Its something there inside me refuses orders. I mean as an example, that somebody who thinks that every single point in me – or at least what shows- is going in the wrong direction. He wishes me smiling and cheerful all the time, friendly in his stupid way, GOSH! And just compares me all the time with some person who is dear to all of us – no question about that- but no matter how dear, if I felt at any instant I am transforming to wards her, forgive me, but my final result will be big fat NO.

I like me still, although all the mis-communication between me and myself, I LOVE me this way.

Life sucks

Betrayed by 2 today.. and my heart was broken into pieces..
then by the 3rd at a row…

Lol at the lolls we once had..
Lol at the laughter we shared
Lol at the one time I thought we are friends
Lol at me in the mirror..

Lol.. when I can’t say anything but lol my friends.. thank you for teaching life is not as pink as I thout it might be when you are around

Rabna ysam7kom… rabna ysam7kom…
That’s all I can say today..

My very dear friend Amir just asked to host my blog on his "Slangonline" server.. and I really can not let him down. Soooo Guess

Bluelue is moving, Bluelue is moving to Slang ;)

Thanks ya Amir ya Slangawy ya kbeeeeer (F)

But I'll keep on blogging in here untill the completetion of the moving in ;)

Yay! Wordpress rocks

Had I ever mentioned my strong hatred for demanding people?
If not, then I am admitting it right now
I DO HATE THEM..
Hate it when someone, highly regarded as a grown up start nagging about something and turning into a headache !!
I mean, yeah, I hate true ya3ni such faces keda…
Its 1st time I shut up.. or may be reply in a nice way.. 2nd time I really keep shut up.. 3rd time I might use some sarcasm or cynical language.. 4th time I burst and even my inner guilt would never stop me from the cannon that would start to FIRE

You want something from the so called being "ME". Then say it ONCE. If twice then make sure I’ve asked you to do so, not from you HEAD. Ok.. then leave me alone after lying in some corner..

The fact is, I can’t get along with someone for long. Its one lf my life’s tragedies begad. Hate to have someone, anyone near. Hate to know that someone, anyone will b sticking to me for long. And could my friendship to some is going ok for long, is that there were and still hell of limits and distances separating us. We are connected to one thing, only a thing, and the rest are left for individual interests. GOSH!
And the harsh part is that, I always feel guilt that I’m hurting someone, anyone always. Those who I meet with this stupid look and hard words. Just can’t help it begad.. can’t help it at all.

The one thing people do not seem to understand about me, is that when I am that down .. if I didn’t come to you –in person- and knock… then do not risk opening the door…
Else, do not get offended from my reflex…

Its when I need any of the 2 around so urgent, I find none..
And both in the same city..

I wonder why I got this strong ESP with that someone especially. I just love being around together.. may be doing nothing.. talking about all the none sense in the world.. listening to some crap.. but just being around for sometimes.. I feel secured.. I feel as if the whole world is pure nothing.. really the whole world is nothing

Yet I always have to wake up on the bitter reality,, the ruthless minds of the living beings and the stupid ignorance by who are we.. and looking at.. how irrelevant we look like..
GOSh.. I hate that.. and I hate that true..

I hate that f3lan.. and I wish to travel there right now and be with my friend (S) ..

And so I am definite more than ever, I’m having dual feelings!!

Ok, like never before, I want to leave this college.. I’m feeling extra bored.. extra fed up to the extend that my final practical exam in a day to come, and I can’t open a single paper… I’ve piled everything to tomorrow.. which means I won’t finish.. but I just can’t study anymore.. that is out of my hands.. and.. GOSH! I hate that place and I hate the people there as well

However, at the same time, I can’t think I might leave it!!! My GOSH!

-- On a hot summer night, would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red
roses?
-- Will he offer me his mouth?
-- Yes

So it’s been this day for everything. YUP! . you know, somehow no matter how life went on rushing, or insanely fast or even slow. You still keep on searching for this tiny corner you’d find yourself sitting waiting for you to come on by and start to move on together again. Sometimes, a bar of choco would do, sometimes listening to your favorite CD or holding a book or talking to a friend or even gossiping about someone you like. Its just, as I always say, forget about the big things and focus on the small ones, these ones what really count.

-- Will he offer me his teeth?
-- Yes

Today morning was strange.

I found this tag yesterday on Moon’s blog, and for some reason I wished to reply ;)
So 1. 2. 3…
Here it goes..


1- Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as your dinner guest? As your close friend? As your lover?
Dinner guest: Bae Yong Jun, no question about that.
Close friend: prefer un-disclose
Lover: hehe..

2- Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by five years to become extremely attractive?
Counting on what exactly I’d be doing in these 5 years.

3- Would you rather spend a month on vacation with your parents or put in overtime at your current job for four weeks without extra compensation?
Sorry..

I found this mail in my inbox today, and gota tell you.. as a girl, I was impressed someway or another.. YEAH! Its almost true (thought some stuff, I'm not that sure about)… so here it is to share..



1. When a girl says she's sad, but she isn't crying, it means she'scrying in her heart.

2. When she ignores you after you've done something wrong, it's bestto give her some time to cool down before touching her heart with anapology.

3.

He was a great man, and deserved all the best through his short days in the world..
May ALLAh reward him in his son and faithful wife after his life..

اللهم ادخله فسيح جناتك

To his soul, I pray to rest..
Amen

PS: please, any passer by to pray for him as well, and read el fate7a.

And so, I’ll be away for a while.. written exams are on till the 11th of June isA, then the start of my practical and oral plus 2 projects ahead. Which means I’d be as busy as a bee till the 1st week of July :D

Anyways, gota say:

Today was supposed to be the last official day in college for this year, before the final exams and the start of the summer vacation (hopefully). However, since I wake up tried, so didn’t find whatever will to go and yet stayed home, which declares that yesterday was my official last day in college..

I know it’s not something big for you; and you’d probably say “that’s how it goes all the time, you entered school, spent around 13 years or so, and then went college.

Forget about people, forget about suffocating time and usual stress.. forget about the normal stupid talks or the random lame actions.. forget about the world’s politics or the internal corrupt..
I know the world would still keep turning and the sun would rise again from the east… but I can’t stop my heart from feeling sadness all thru..
Yesterday we had to give up on our flat to live in that new one that I still can’t love… and today.. my father will sell our car for a new wider one !!

I can still remember the day I opened our x-flat’s balcony, was about 4 or 5 years old, when I saw a small little red car under , my father was outside one door waving with one hand and peeping with the other… when my mother cuddled me in her warm arms and whispered “say hello to our new car..”..

To the one who passed along my door without knock knocks, only a week ago, yet turned everything up side down with a magical stick.. The gloom became beautiful meadows with chanting birds and glittering flowers.. and the "falling down" became a tree with fruitful blossoms sticking firmly to the ground …

Let “thank you” said not in words, but deeds life long isA

Yours,
Grateful you've landed from your cloud..

Its been 3 days back to back listening to the same musical piece “Country waltz” .. and still can’t interpret how pure I feel.. as if, as if I’ve been touched by a sentimental angle all of a sudden!!
I’ve turned very sensitive lately; I’ve taken a lot of un-reasonable decisions; some passed by safely yet some left a crack inside.

You know what I am thinking of right now!
I won’t do it.. I won’t..

I WILL NOT GO FOR IT ANYMORE..

and let the whole world burn... 3ashan I am fed up w bas.

Before I start, to the most beautiful person.. to Bibo..
“ I do not really what to tell you girl, Just forget the past and think of your colorful future..
You’ve been dreaming of him for long… tell him “Yes”.. please
Tell him “YES, I DO LOVE YOU..” with the highest voice you might ever have..
BiBo… You’ll be the most beautiful bride.. I know that girl.. I know that..
YOU deserve to be happy..
YOU deserve to have all what you’ve dreamt.. :)
I do not know how to show how happy I feel NOW,,
But know for sure, YOU gave me much more to look forward for..

I missed college’s bus today. The sub-lecturer kept on talking and talking un-aware that the time was up! Not only this, but also he gave us 2 extra reports to write in “assembly language” !! ..*whatever.. I do not care that much any more..*
But then I had to take a public bus ; wasn’t that encouraging journey until I got off. You know, I usually take another transport to my house.. and sometimes I walk. So today, I was in the mood for the hard way .. walking back home..

Somehow I needed to walk..

I know by now, we will have a picture together isA.. I will never let it go..

العقل فى التفكير والرب فى التدبير
Mind is for thinking, but God is for making it come true
ولله الأمر من قبل و من بعد
For God got everything to do after all..


Acknowledgments:
Thank YOU Noha for standing beside me.. and Nado for filling me with strength and hope..
Girlies.. I will never give up and will never know how to thank you :)
You bet my dearest ;)

Yours always and always..
The Flavor "Blue"